See you in 4 days!

Some people may be surprised to hear that I've never been backpacking before. I am in the car heading to High Point, New Jersey for work. I am hoping I can catalogue the trip well enough to relay in a fun and interesting way. I am thinking really hard about starting a facilitation weblog, if only because I would love to do some presentations at AEE regional conferences, and I think it'd be a great way to roll those ideas around the Internet. Part of me wonders if there are any collaborative blogs or groups of experiential educators who write. Getting carsick, gotta stop. Back on Sunday!

New Layout

Ta-dummm!

Applications just may be the death of me

I can't even imagine applying for jobs before the internet, as young as that makes me sound. Even so, of my 12+ schools I'm applying for full-time positions for this fall, only a few are accepting online applications without any supplements. Seriously? Well, anyway, here's my cover letter-- April 3, 2008 To the House Director search committee: I am seeking a position that will allow me to continue to work with a diverse population of college students and employment as a house director at Hampshire College would be an important step on my journey as a student affairs professional. My skills and experiences coincide with the description of responsibilities of a house director. Attached are my application materials, including my resume and a list of professional references. Highly-visible, friendly and compassionate student affairs professionals help provide students with an education that is well-rounded and not just academic in nature. It is my personal commitment to the development and support of the whole student that would make me a strong asset to your residence life team and coincides with the goals of Hampshire College. Of particular interest will be my varied experiences in leadership, residence life, and programming in the context of a small private institution. My passion for working with college students stems from my time at the Maryland Institute College of Art as an involved undergraduate student and residential community advisor. Four years at MICA have given me a dynamic education as both a fibers artist and creative problem-solver, but I knew when I was putting off hitting the studio for planning programs or spending time with my residents, that I had a greater desire and energy to serve full-time in the field of student affairs than pursue a career as a fine artist. In addition to my art and residence life background, I also have experiential education, team-building, crisis management and conflict resolution skills from my work in the outdoors and camp environments. Given the diverse skill-sets outlined in my resume, I am well-prepared to embrace a broad range of roles that would likely be required of me at a small liberal arts school like Hampshire College. Many thanks to the committee in advance considering my application. I would be delighted to further discuss my skills and qualifications, and I look forward to the possibility of serving your institution and students this upcoming year. Respectfully yours, Elle I really hope I get some call-backs for these applications. I'm going to spend the rest of the evening working on them, I spent the entire day working on the cover letter, but now that cover letter has to be re-written for every single school with the appropriate things changed, most hall director letters will be very similar but the more student-activities type positions will need a decent overhaul. I feel like I'm applying for so many positions, but I have no idea what the competition is like. All I know is that I have three summer job offers, and I probably can't take any of them (all outdoor jobs) because for student affairs jobs you start in the summer and help put training together for the fall RA's. I have simply got to be just the person SOMEONE is looking for, and if fate is kind, hopefully I'll get in touch with them or didn't throw out the application already. PS: I made Boinkable links again today with my Kevin Smith-Chasing Amy entry. I am feeling the love from Richard Blakeley at the cute/dirty/smart sex-positive blog these days, and y'all know the quickest way to a girls' heart is to link to a post of hers on a highly trafficked site.

First 'blogs were written

I'd like to propose that Sei Shonagon, the Heian-era Japanese female court lady, was as a blogger. In the book of her collected works, The Pillow Book, she lists insights and goings-on in no order more thoughtful than that in which they came to mind. How like Carrie Bradshaw, or any contemporary young 3rd-gen feminist woman is Shonagon in her book! This is an example that I think is lovely, the 10th-century equivalent of "and he woke me up looking for his car keys, how annoying!" Hateful Things, Sei Shonagon A lover who is leaving at dawn announces that he has to find his fan and his paper. "I know I put them somewhere last night," he says. Since it is pitch-dark, he gropes about the room, bumping into the furniture and muttering, "Strange! Where can they be?" Finally he discovers the objects. He thrusts the paper into the breast of his robe with a great rustling sound; then he snaps open his fan and busily fans away with it. Only now is he ready to take his leave. What charmless behavior! "Hateful" is an understatement. Equally disagreeable is the man who, when leaving in the middle of the night, takes care to fasten the cord of his headdress. This is quite unnecessary; he could perfectly well put it gently on his head without tying the cord. And why must he spend time adjusting his cloak or hunting costume? Does he really think that someone may see him at this time of night and criticize him for not being impeccably dressed? A good lover will behave as elegantly at dawn as at any other time. He drags himself out of bed with a look of dismay on his face. The lady urges him on: "Come, my friend, it's getting light. You don't want anyone to find you here." He gives a deep sigh, as if to say that the night has not been nearly long enough and that it is agony to leave. Once up, he does not instantly pull on his trousers. Instead, he comes close to the lady and whispers whatever was left unsaid during the night. Even when he is dressed, he still lingers, vaguely pretending to be fastening his sash. Presently he raises the lattice, and the two lovers stand together by the side door while he tells her how he dreads the coming day, which will keep them apart; then he slips away. The lady watches him go, and this moment of parting will remain among her most charming memories. Indeed, one's attachment to a man depends largely onthe elegance of his leave-taking. When he jumps out of bed, scurries about the room, tightly fastens his trouser-sash, rolls up the sleeves of his Court cloak, over-robe, or hunting costume, stuffs his belongings into the breast of his robe and then briskly secures the outer sash -- one really begins to hate him.

Update for the new homies

Boinkology (one of my favorite sex blogs) linked to an entry of mine today in it's BOINKABLE LINKS section! That post is here (it's the one on musicians), and I'd like to heartily welcome any of the newcomers via Boinkology, if you like my interests but not my 'blog persay, check out my shared posts via my google reader sidebar. This semester I've been taking RAD, which is Rape Agression Defense Systems self-defense class for women. First of all, it's weird that rape is the first word in their company/system name. I'm not like Heather MacDonald, who recently wrote a Los Angeles Times op-ed piece "What campus rape crisis?" I know not a lot of women self-report, and that the scum that does commit rape and assault has done it 16 times by the time they're caught by law enforcement. I'd like to believe that the number one fear of women should not be to be raped. And I'd like to think that that's not the worst thing that could happen to me, but I guess not much else could top that. Either way, I'm super pumped about my RAD simulation next Tuesday, and I think that every person should have these basic self-defense techniques in their belt. I was never petrified of walking around Baltimore at night, but now I know that I'm a force to be reckoned with. Unless that person has a gun or knife, in which case I don't know as well how to confront that situation. Oh well. The hair is finally starting to grow out, I overdyed it pink because it was looking a little ashy/mousy, and every time I sweat or sleep there's pink everywhere. D'oh. And now, for excessive quotation marks, care of Parkhurst at MICA.

Motvational Quote of the Day

Keep writing. Keep doing it and doing it. Even in the moments when it's so hurtful to think about writing. Heather B. Armstrong of Dooce.com. I've been thinking about starting a historically-based blog on being dooced (that is, losing one's job for what one has written on their weblog), as sort of a warning to bloggers out there and support for those who's online and off-line lives have converged in that perfect-storm sort of way that causes you to reasses your values and existence. And, you know, find another employer. In case you're curious, here's a link to my previous entry On Doocing.... The entry lists 19 bloggers as of March 2007, so obviously it needs a little updating. I think it's also an art piece I'd like to work on, maybe a commemorative quilt or graveyard quilt?

In absentia

Apologies for the lack of postings and updates, it's the last week of finals here and I'm just huddling in my emergency space blanket working until it s al over. Many thanks to Marc for his care package, there aren't words enough to express my gratitude. Sunday I'll be on my way back to California. There are finals to finish up, dishes to wash and a fridge to clean out, but more pressing is talking with Justin about "us." Last year I came back to Baltimore only to be broken up with, and not only was that not what I would have liked, but my parents were upset at his choice of timing. I mean, so was I. It's so easy for him and I to go through our days, recap, and relax with one another, but at a certain point those crucial questions need to be addressed. So far, there just hasn't been any time, and I'm not really forseeing any until later this week, if then. Maybe Saturday? Today I'm going to Robert E. Lee park to take photos of my hi-tech/touch Mudpie garments, being worn by trees (hopefully), so we will see how that goes. After that I'm going to my friends' place to make matzo ball soup. Note to self: borrow fifteen spoons for Way of Tea final. Then it's working on thesis/fashion/multi-media event homework, then a couple papers for Tea and History of Women in Art, then just more presenting of my own work till Friday at 3 pm. And, lo, how glorious that will be! Friday, on the up-side, in the wintery-mix of crummy weather we've been having, I went for the first time to H&H surplus, up on Eutaw Street here in Baltimore city, and I am deeply regretful it took me almost four years to go. If I needed to survive the zombie invasion, this is where I would barricade myself and my fellow survivors to outfit our party for the brain-eating apocalypse. And, finally, I must give a little shout-out to my new favorite litte faux bois blog, It's (K)not Wood. Part of me knows I have so much stuff I may as well start getting well-designed things I love, and part of me wants to put it all in storage and live out of a backpack. Finished chrismukkah shopping!

Save the drama for your mama.

The mind boggles. Hung out with J last night since he was on-duty in my building and got massive amounts of Asian Taste, watched Harry Potter and G4. I spent all day in the studio yesterday and didn't get a TON done, today I'm working on all of my papers and doing some rag rugging. I know that he hasn't been the most reliable friend, but I can trust him, and he can trust me, so here we are doing a dance of a different sort than this time last year, figuring out how to be friends. I'm finally getting used to the space, to filling my own life and days. I mean, I've been working towards it for a while. So, I'm writing a paper as my final for Blog As Memoir. Six to seven pages, I might even typeset it as an accordion book which would be part of a blogging meetup pin of some sort...it would certainly be awesome to do a business card, too. But sort of peripherary to the paper. Right. The paper I've got to write. Yes.

New study by Pew Internet

Pew Internet just published a new report (by Amanda Lenhart and Mary Madden) that discusses the ways in which teens organize what information is on their various profiles on social networking sites to keep privy information far from the prying eyes of parents, teachers. Teens, Privacy and Online Social Networks: How teens manage their online identities and personal information in the age of MySpace As I continue my readings on blogging I can't even fathom how I let myself post indiscreetly so long (two months?) ago. While one can post impulsively, it takes one little click to share your most private thoughts, and when exposed to public space they can have considerable power that sort of contradicts the ease of sharing.

Blog organization

So, now that this blog has a substantial number of entries (75), I've got to consider whether or not the current 'list everything you talked about in that entry' sort of tagging is going to work in the long-term. (Do you like how I start paragraphs with 'so?' Why or why not? Effectively make you feel like we've just picked back up in the middle of a conversation, or trite and lame?) Yes, the long term. I am not the most long-sighted of all individuals. After all, each day I have some sort of crisis of self, and I can't POSSIBLY even think about the blip it will be eventually when the world is ending oh g-d my life is horrible! How do I divide my ponderings as Elle in a way that not only makes sense to me, but that summarizes what my life and this journal are about? Also, I'm thinking of typesetting my entire LiveJournal as a book and printing it into a physical entity, to see how that reads.

Here is where I blame someone:

I blame myself for not posting regularly. In my exhaustion in the evenings, I forget to make my journal posts while I still have energy or something interesting to blog about. I've been taking lots of photos with my mobile's camera, and writing a TON in my sketchbook, but I haven't had a lot of time or need to get my thoughts down on paper. Or in 1's and 0's. I think it's because I've been trying really hard to get out problems to my friends, as opposed to myself. Anyway, I'll try and do a few in the next day or so to make up for it. I've also read about three articles that I need to go ahead and blog about for purposes of my coursework.

My Mistake

And then I chopped off all of my hair. And by "I", I mean W. And by "all" I mean "most." In a bizarre turn of events, the ex just started a Blogger-powered weblog. We are not certain as to how we feel about this right now, but time will tell. Tonight I get to own up to about 40 people that I made some mistakes, and because of that I've got to do something that I truly don't want to do. I've forgiven myself, at this point. I made mistakes, I've learned from them, and I'm never going to make those same mistakes again. But, as an RCA I'm not allowed to make so many mistakes as all of that.

Recap of last night

Last night was amaaaaaaaaaaaazing. I had the closing reception for my community's show at 6 pm and we hooked up the Wii and played some Wii Sports. We also made peppermint hot chocolate, which was, studies show, delicious. Then, AP and Unnoficial Resident Boy and Waffleface came over to my place, where we talked about Jewish boys and Elebits and I lent The Big Bang out to yet another person. After that, AP and I changed into PJ's and watched the ever-popular Garden State, and then at the end we got all dressed up and ran amok and "ice skated" wearing boots and pj's and a couple layers of sweatshirts. Having copious amounts of energy, we then wandered all the way to the Belvedere to the skyline lounge, checked out the view, looked in windows, slipped around on black ice, felt bad for two women in a VW, and wandered until we ended up at XS. But, being that we were too good for XS and prefered pizza, we got a pie. Then we brought it back to the commons, put some fresh parmesean on it, and ate that sucker. Plans for tonight include movie with W, and blogging some more. I love my residents so much!

On "Finding Voice"

Regarding finding my voice... and the blog Blog Core Values. So, the blogging "voice" doesn't exist.  Or rather, we write, we read, or "see" words, instead of hearing them.  The author uses the word "telephonic," the longing for something that is as ephemeral as the powerful feelings we have sometimes.  But, text, html, blog survives voice, body, phase.   I'm failing at blogging every day.  I wait till night, when I've got a whole day to blog about, but do I really want to write about the day I just spent?  How I didn't finish the dishes, how I read and read but couldn't put fingers to keyboard.  I've committed myself to this independent study, but I've got to admit that I've comitted myself to this for me, not for my instructor.  This is a selfish desire to be introspective for myself, and put it out there for all to read. It is actually the loss of selfishness, I think, that led to the end of my relationship with Justin.  I became obsessed with HIS life, HIS existence, HIS work, not my own.  This isn't a tendency far from my lineage.  My mom is a Sacrificer.  She Sacrifices.  And that's noble and good but at some point there's nobody else there but you, and you've got to be happy with yourself when you are on your own. Right, so, back to "finding my voice."  Stop looking for instant identity.  It will take a little while for my personality to come out in this space, and that's to be expected.  Everything I've read in "You've Got Blog" has taught me that.  So, tonight I'm going to keep writing till I'm near-empty.

Blogging for winners

So, I've been reading Rebecca Blood's book on blogging, and also "We've Got Blog" (2001), a critical reader on blogging and how blog culture is changing the internet and our world. And I'm very excited because I'm ahead of SO many bloggers, in that I've been weblogging for public eyes since I was about 13-14 on the popular site LiveJournal as the user lenablair.  But, now that I've been reading all of this theory and criticism and am sort of experiencing the subtle yet numerous differences between LiveJournal and Blogger, I'm experiencing anxiety over writing.  Others apparently get bloggorhea with the ease that entries are posted, but I've been constipated more and more as I've gotten older, spent less and less time in front of a computer. Thus, I've grown to understand that I am an experienced weblogger, but have not, historically been conscientious.  I wrote to get ideas out in this unique forum, my friends' "Friends pages."  In a friends' page one is given a glimpse into the thoughts, feelings, and happenings of one's friends/acquaintences/"friends."  But, I still haven't quite figured out how Atom, RSS feeds, and XML fit into this all, that is, I'm so used to having all the most recent entries of ALL of my friends blogs show up sorted by time and date posted, that I'm not sure how to really delve into reading non-LiveJournal blogs and becoming a part of that community, since it seems to be more based on this earlier idea of the weblog, which was more of a filter for cool new sites on the web or news stories, as opposed to this sort of common public diary. So, I need to tackle these technical aspects:  I need to keep writing entries, write seeds of entries, even if I keep them private till I feel like (or never) develop them.  I've got to read other blogs.  I've got to find other artists that aren't computer-based in media and figure out how they work out blogging.  This is actually a foremost concern because I find myself having less and less time in front of my laptop, and it's not as easy to post impulsively. Then, I must work to find my voice.  What is the tone, content, and personality people will associate with my blog?  How can I reveal more of the more interesting aspects of my life while still using Blogger like LiveJournal to catalogue banalities of daily existence? But, if anyone knows anything about how I can make a friends page with my LiveJournal friends and RSS and Atom feeds on it, I'd be super-super excited to know.