Miracles are happening in Blairstown!

Update on the cross burning in Hardwick Township, just a mile and a quarter down the road from me. There was a Unity March which I got off of work too late to attend in front of the home. I work with a lot of inner-city kids out here in Blairstown, and it's a blessing the story hasn't picked up the coverage it might have. I have moved all my Twitter mini-mobile updates to an old livejournal, so if you are interested in reading those add http://lenablair.livejournal.com to your RSS feed readers. From here on out to the near future, only full-on real-live 'blogging will be happening on this 'blog. Prom promise. Oh, and the miracles I'm speaking of? Upon returning from working in Princeton and Newark this week, my iPhone battery was draining more quickly than it should have last night. And then I realized that my laptop connection was operating at lightening-fast speeds. Three-G has come to Warren County, and it is as awesome as I've always dreamed! I'm recovering very well from my illness that struck on the west coast. I'm processing my experience at the AEE conference. I'm getting my work-outs in, and feeling okay about my body. There's something I've been putting off for FAR TOO LONG, and I'm working up the courage to bite the bullet. Life post-college for me is shaping up to be pretty great, don't worry too much about me. I'd love to do what I can, and if that means being a late-night sounding-board, I'm strong, let me share that load you're shouldering. And if you need a void to send the ether of your thoughts, I will be the best void I can be. Looking forward to being able to walk and ice skate to work this winter. My commute of 3 minutes will be halved when the lake is solid enough.

All's Quiet on the Eastern Front

I'm slightly behind on my blogging, which is truly sort of tragic since so much has been going on. Of course, I've been living my life instead of blogging about it, but I'm not forgetting about blogging, and I've made lots of mobile photo posts while living my life, even if I haven't written about them yet. I'm all moved-in to the new place, left my apartment in the Commons pretty damn barren, which is always sort of a flashback to pre-college, or the end of the summer, or moving in freshman year. Unlike last times I moved, I actually managed my time and packing pretty well, and even spackeld all the holes I put in my wall and removed the anchors. Still, hard to believe I'm probably not going to be living in the Commons, MICA's freshman dorms, ever again. I have a real spot in my heart for that place. It snowed again on Tuesday, which is sort of exciting. This time it was real, Maryland snow, light and powdery and not for packing, unlike when I went sledding with my residents a couple weeks ago. Anyway, gotta fold laundry, unpack, and hope my bag of electronics shows up at some point. I miss being an RCA allready, but it's nice to be able to just be a student, too. And I know I'm not, nor will I ever be, "just a student." More on that later.

Sleepless nights

I tossed and turned. Shuttered the blinds, throw the curtains closed. Maybe it was the kona blend coffee I drank while watching Employee of the Month with W. Every crumb and particle that sandwiched between my skin and the sheets was a pea under my mattress, rendering it impossible for me to sleep. I brushed away the detritus, made and re-made my bed, tried to reach some sort of equilibrium of temperature where my nose was cool but not cold and my body was warm but not quite beginning to sweat. I went to bed at 11:40. At midnight I was up. I woke up and puttered around for a few minutes around two, when I finally unplugged my night-light. I covered the ambient blue light shining from the spine of my laptop. I wrote, re-wrote, deleted text messages, unsent, to lots of different people. From experience, I know late-night text-messaging is a risky business. At 8 o'clock, I was up. By half past I was waiting at the desk of the Commons for my New York Times to come so I could read Modern Love, maybe walk to City Cafe and get some coffee. As the paper arrived, he and I crossed paths. Twice, since I realized I needed more appropriate footwear for the grungy, icy walk to the supermarket. Today I'm making Magnolia cupcakes with my friend, I splurged on organic butter, eggs, and sugar. I have never made cupcakes from scratch. Instead of going to the cafe, I stopped at Dunkin' Donuts for coffee and a french cruller doughnut on the way to Safeway. I vaccilate between my head being cold and enjoying the breeze tracing paths across my shorn head and neck. And now I'm back in PJ's, avoiding the winter fund drive and guilt that comes along with it on WYPR, listening to Pandora, contemplating the days ahead. And, G-d, is there a lot to be contemplated.

Mystery flowers

SNOW DAY! I recieved a bouquet of tulips today, and a box of chocolates. It's too bad flowers and candy can't cure the feeling of heartbreak. There's no note or name or anything on the tulips. Today is sort of bizzare, Two hours later: I feel like my heart is breaking. It's the same sort of pain and hurt that has not a whole lot to do with anger or blame, just regret and sadness for things changing. I also feel like my face and ears are on fire; The fire of victory. The fire and burn of oil and gold and natural gas. Rather, I took 6-7 residents sledding at the station building. And, lo, was it glorious. I used the same sled I made freshman year once I learned to use the impulse sealer. A new set of freshmen using an old sled. My residents bring out the proud mama in me (even though I know they are not kids, babies, children), and I know they'll be just fine as they finish off the year. It'll be a little different, and there will be some changes, but they will be for the better, really. Everything still feels so bizarre and I feel like I may be in a perpetual state of shock still, but things are starting to sink in a little. Everyone's being really supportive, and that means a lot to me. They're adults, they will be fine, and I'm going to re-learn caring about myself. I'm thankful for all the people who care about me and all the people I have cared for, and the experience I've gained. Just wish I hadn't learned things the hard way.