Fred Lazarus

Little in words can convey the love I have for MICA's bow-tied president of the past twenty years. In his time, the endowment has grown from under $2 million to almost $22 million. He also looks charmingly goofy, what with his kind smile, laughing eyes, and flamboyant yellow tie. Unlike most MICAns, I think MICA's doing a whole lot well. It costs $55 million to run our fair institution per year, and twenty-eight cents of each dollar I spend on tuition goes to the pool of financial aid given to students. I only wish that more people knew President Lazarus, and that he'd get to know us better (as he earnestly professed he wanted to at today's town hall meeting). Which is why I say, Fred Lazarus III, get thee to Facebook. Who would dare leave a defamatory comment? How can one criticise that smiling face? The very sight of this man on campus makes me giggle like the little schoolgirl I am by comparison. People don't even realize they can email him at flazarus@mica.edu . I also think that we should have more programming involving the president. When was the last time a resident assistant asked Fred out to go duck-pin bowling (a common Maryland pasttime)? Perhaps he makes a mean green-bean casserole and should be invited to a potluck. Maybe he likes feeding pigeons. The point is, Fred Lazarus is the hero of this institution, and I think he should have a waterfall AND duck pond. Fred Lazarus's great-grandfather also was the man that had them move Thanksgiving two weeks earlier, to lengthen the holiday shopping season. That's pretty great, right? Also, I kind of adore Provost Ray Allen. And I wish this CSA would stop cutting cables in the Station computer lab. It's kind of bringing me down.